Diabolik Lovers Episode 11: “I am becoming interested in you as a man.”

Cordelia’s back, and she’s ready to…make passes at her children.

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DIABOLIK LOVERS – IS THERE ANYTHING YOU COULD DO TO MAKE ME SHIP THIS HARDER?!

We start off right where we left off, with Cordelia now in full control of Yui’s body. She starts off the advent of her resurrection by grabbing some nice wine, kicking back on a couch, and flirting with Richter. Her pleasant relaxation is soon interrupted, however, as Reiji decides to crash the party.

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They spend a couple lines going back and forth, with Reiji insulting Cordelia and her attempting to take them in stride. All in all, good times.

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What follows is by far one of the strangest conversations I’ve seen.

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Cordelia sure knows how to romance her son!

After this encounter with Reiji, Laito, Subaru, and Kanato  show up in typical dramatic fashion to deliver some great one-liners accompanied by DRAMATIC CLOSEUPS.

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Richter can’t resist the opportunity to taunt them and show off his manliness. And add in some sexual tension by implying that the siblings and himself are rivals for Cordelia’s affections.

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Out of nowhere, Shuu then joins the fray. Turns out he was just laying on the couch in the living room the whole time and didn’t say a word up until now!

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Wait, this is new. Was Karl Heinz actually alive this whole time and just conspicuously absent from the entire narrative?! Those “abandoned father figure” vibes…

That aside, I’m having a ball watching the ridiculous back and forth super-amped up exchange between Richter and co. (remember, this is all accompanied by DRAMATIC MUSIC). Cordelia, however, is less than pleased.

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Who knew that underneath her cold, harsh exterior there hid a wonderful, cheery, loving individual! And the only thing standing in her way is ALL OF HER CHILDREN (or pseudo-children, since it looks like Karl had some mistresses).

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Well that escalated quickly. Cordelia sure knows how to get things done! Her plans don’t go so smoothly though. BECAUSE IT TURNS OUT RICHTER WAS ACTUALLY SECRETLY USING HER THIS WHOLE TIME OMG NO ONE SAW THAT COMING EVEN THOUGH SHE TREATED HIM LIKE SHIT UWAAAAAAAAAAAAA

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Just as things are getting dicey, Ayato jumps into the fray.

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AWWWW HE LOVES HER <3 <3 <3

They then proceed to fight over Yui/Cordelia with their dicks (symbolically, of course).

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Alas, it turns out Ayato just can’t perform when it matters most.

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BUT ALL IS NOT LOST, FOR AYATO’S BLOOD BRINGS YUI BACK TO HER SENSES, AND SHE MANAGES TO ESCAPE FROM RICHTER’S IRON-HARD GRIP.

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Cue dramatic close-ups to illustrate how shocking this development is!

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Seeing all the pain she is causing, Yui decides to take matters into her own hands…and stabs herself with Subaru’s knife.

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If the previous scenes hadn’t been so ridiculous, I think I would’ve appreciated the irony of her death here much more. Instead, I found myself gesturing wildly at the screen in complete incredulity.

Richter, however, took all of this in stride. Attempting to take advantage of the situation and steal Yui/Cordelia’s body back, he charges…right into Ayato’s fully erect member.

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Bleeding profusely, Richter stumbles off. Cordelia takes the opportunity to take over Yui’s body once again so she can taunt Ayato.

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With those final words, Cordelia/Yui collapses in Ayato’s arms, dead. To indicate the full gravity of the situation, the camera pulls out for a dramatic overhead shot.

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Now, it might just be me, but I thought this would’ve been a good place to end the show (and hint at a second season!). BUT OF COURSE THIS IS AN OTOME GAME ADAPTATION WHAT AM I THINKING THERE’S ONE MORE EPISODE LEFT TO MAKE SURE WE GET TO THE “GOOD END” HAHAHA PHEW THAT WAS A CLOSE ONE.

CUE BLOOD RED MOON. (Seriously though – how often are they going to use this?!)

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CUT TO CREDITS.

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